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JESUS' DIARY
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QUESTIONS
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ON REQUEST

       THE DIARY OF JESUS

This is an imaginary diary of Jesus. It attempts to focus on the events that
happened in Rome and in Jerusalem during the lifetime of Jesus. These are all
events that would have made an impact on Jesus and his ministry.

The calendar uses dates from the Jewish calendar. Our own calendar is a few
years off. According to this calendar Jesus was born in the year 6 BC. The year 1
AD in the calendar is the year 3761.

24 NISAN 3766 (10th year of Herod Antipas reign)

Mom and dad were quite upset with me. I guess I just got carried away and didn't
realize how late it was. By the time I did it was impossible for me to try and find
them. The best thing was to stay in the temple and let them find me. But they did
not see it that way.

Several of the teachers in the temple wanted me to stay and study there. Mom and
dad would not hear of that. As we were leaving, BarDaniel, one of the teachers,
suggested that I keep a diary of my thoughts, my questions, and my experiences.
This is my first try. WHAT DID I LEARN FROM THIS EXPERIENCE?

I don't just live for myself. I affect others, need to be more aware of how little
things I do affect others.


FOLLOWING SABBATH

Felt strange at the synagogue today. I think word is out about what happened in
Jerusalem. No one talked to me. I heard mom and dad talking later. They felt the
same isolation.

SIX MONTHS LATER

It has been difficult to write. I don't even like to think about it. Life here at home
has become more normal. We have come closer together as a family. That is the
only way we have been able to survive. Everyone seems to avoid us.

Heard there is a new high priest, Annas.

8 SHEBAT 3767

Joseph told me today that when I was about two years old he and mom had to take
me to Egypt because my life was threatened. Joseph still seems upset when he
talks about it. It really sounds like a wild tale.

12 ADAR 3767

Have been talking to many of the elders of the community. As strange as it seems
Joseph's story is probably true. I'm not sure Herod was out to get me specifically.
Apparently he was some kind of maniac. He had almost all of his children killed.
Why would he take so much care to send them to Rome so they would receive a
good education and then bring them home and have them killed?

14 ADAR

Joseph says Herod was a maniac. He doesn't seem to want to talk about it. Or
maybe he is just such a good person that he cannot understand someone like
Herod.

24 ADAR

Still thinking about Herod killing his children. I need to forget it and think about
something else.

19 NISAN 3768

Met the new high priest Annas. I don't trust him.

1 SIVAN 3768

Realize now why I don't trust Annas. He was appointed by the Roman procurator.
He owes his office to the Romans. Yet when he is among the people he is
constantly berating the Romans. He certainly had to do something to win their
pleasure. Which is the true Annas?

3 SIVAN

How can our religious leaders be faithful to the covenant when they are directed
by the Romans?

10 SIVAN

Joseph says I ask too many questions.

12 SIVAN

Was rereading my diary. Couldn't help but notice the ending of my first entry: "I
don't just live for myself. I affect others, need to be more aware of how little things
I do affect others."

Better stop asking so many questions. I don't want to hurt mom or dad.

5 ELUL 3769

It has been over a year since I have written in my diary. I will soon be fifteen years
old. Joseph wants me to take over the business. I don't want to hurt his feelings
but I don't really think that is what I want to do.



10 ADAR 3770

Have been taking over more and more control of the business. However, my heart
is not in it.

12 VEADAR 3770

We have an extra month this year. Seven times every nineteen years we add an
extra month. One of the teachers explained that we have 354 days in our year. We
have alternating months of 30 days and 29 days. We would be celebrating the
summer feasts in the cold months and the winter feasts in the warm months if we
didn't make some kind of an adjustment.

23 NISAN 3770

Saw John at Passover. He is having same problem as I. Zachary expects John to
succeed him as priest and John doesn't want to do it. His dad regards him as a
rebel. John is not at all happy with what he sees among the priests. John and I
need to get together and talk.

12 SHEBAT 3770

Has been almost ten months since I wrote in this diary. It is so difficult. If I write
then I have difficulty concentrating on my work. If I do not write then there is a
tension, a sense that I am neglecting something very important. I wish I had never
started this diary.

23 NISAN 3771

Spent a few days after Passover with John. There is little room for persons of our
age in temple thought or temple activity. If we were willing to go and learn set
questions and set answers we would be accepted. If we ask a different set of
questions we are ignored and rejected.

John is especially disliked because he is reluctant to pursue the training
necessary to follow his father's footsteps as a priest.

3 SIVAN 3771

It has taken 30 years to build the temple and it is nowhere near complete. It has
taken a lot of money and has much slave labor. WHY?

6 ELUL 3771

Got into an argument with our local rabbi over the temple. It seems that almost
anyone connected with the local synagogues or the temple is in support of Herod
Antipas. At least they will not speak out publicly.

12 SHEBAT 3771

There is a group who opposes the Romans. It is the Zealot party. They are against
any Roman intervention: taxation, census, anything which recognizes Roman
jurisdiction. They have a bad name. They raid and they kill. They will even kill Jews
whom they think co-operate with the Romans.

18 NISAN 3772

John was telling me of several groups who have formed out in various desert
areas. They have simply abandoned our entire political and religious system. They
live very solitary lives. They live in caves. However, they do come together to
pray, to eat, and to share the results of their study. John seems interested in the
group. I don't think I would like such a solitary and desolate life.

12 TISHRI 3772

Have heard from several others about the hermits in the desert. One group lives
near Qumran out by the Dead Sea. They are trying to preserve some of the writings
of the prophets.

These hermits are very anti Roman. They don't seem to be warriors like the Zealots.

11 TISHRI 3773

Joseph is not well. He is a good man.

13 TISHRI 3773

Joseph seems to be failing.

14 TISHRI 3773

Joseph told me today that he thought I had great power. He asked me to touch him
and pray over him.

15 TISHRI 3773

Felt very weak today. That prayer over Joseph took a lot out of me.

16 TISHRI 3773

Joseph seems to be getting stronger.

22 TISHRI 3773

Joseph was able to work in the shop for a few hours today.

4 ADAR 3773

Joseph has been fully recovered for several weeks.

16 ADAR 3773

Found another group with whom I might have some quarrels, Scribes. In many
places they are the only persons who can read and write. They write the history.
No one knows whether what they write is true or not. They write the law. They
interpret the law. They even act as judges. Many of them are also Pharisees. They
have a lot of power. There is usually no one who can challenge them.

18 NISAN 3774

At Passover, much of the talk in Jerusalem was about Caesar Augustus. He is now
76 years old. People are beginning to talk about his death and what will happen
when he dies. Augustus has not appeared in public for several weeks. He has
asked for his stepson, Tiberius, to be named as the co-emperor with him.

One thing which seems certain is that with a new emperor Annas will be replaced
as high priest.

19 NISAN 3774

Had a difficult time at Passover. Got into several arguments with different
members of the Pharisees. They are so fixed on the law. I know we need laws. But
they exist for the good of people. Sometimes I think many of the Pharisees believe
the law is more important than people. I can foresee having difficulty with them
later in life. Several of them told me I will change some of my "foolish" ideas when
I "mature".

29 SIVAN 3774

Heard today that Caesar Augustus did not read the renewal of the promises of his
office. He asked Tiberius to read them for him. He was supposed to have said that
he would not be around to fulfill them. Tiberius would be. Seems pretty certain that
Tiberius will be the new emperor.

11 TISHRI 3774

Caesar Augustus has died. Tiberius has succeeded him.

3 SHEBAT 3774

Tiberius Caesar has named Valerius Gratus as new procurator.

12 SHEBAT 3774

When Valerius Gratus became procurator Annas was forced to resign as high
priest. A good start.

19 NISAN 3775

A lot of turmoil among the priests. They really resent the power of the procurator
to appoint the high priest. Several of them didn't particularly like Annas. They just
don't like Roman puppets selecting their leader.

As a reult of this action of Valerius Gratus, John has definitely decided he will not
follow in his father's footsteps as priest.

2 SIVAN 3775


I need to get away and clear my head. I want to take a pilgrimage and try to retrace
my religious roots. Want to go to Ur where Father Abraham first begin his journey.
Then to Babylon where so many persons abandoned our religious practises.

20 SIVAN 3775

Spent several days at Qumran. Decided to begin my pilgrimage here. Very
impressed with the monks. I especially admire their dedication, the simplicity of
their lives, and their complete dedication to studying and copying the writings of
the prophets, especially Isaiah.

Many of the local rabbis do not favor the writings of Isaiah. In their view Isaiah
should have attacked the Babylonians not the Israelites.

Monks at Qumran practise a ritual called baptism.

27 SIVAN 3775

Ended up staying an extra week at Qumran. Was really intrigued by their ceremony
of baptism. Had heard of it before. Some local rabbis use it as a ceremony to
receive non Jews into their synagogue.

The Qumran group sees baptism only as a sign. It does not effect anything. They
believe only God can cleanse. Baptism is a sign that the person has already been
converted to God.

13 TISHRI 3775

Met many of my own people here in Babylon. Many stayed here after the time of
exile. Many married Babylonians. Over the centuries since the end of the exile our
blood lines have become mixed. Some have abandoned their religious tradition
but most have remained faithful.

19 TISHRI 3775

Am deeply impressed by the hospitality of my people here. There is a much
different attitude here than in Jerusalem. People here know that God will be with
his people wherever they are. It is not necessary to be in our own land. There is
also a great sense that God is the God of all peoples, not just a select few. It has
been a marvelous experience. Would like to stay.

20 NISAN 3776

Am back to roots of Abraham. Here in Ur in the land of Chaldea. Very barren land.
Can see why Abraham left and sought a new land. Some of our most ancient
religious legends started here (the flood and the tower of babel). Saw the ruins of
an ancient structure which date from about the year 1650 (2100 years ago).

This story has become essential to our religious belief. In the story the world was a
single people. God was troubled by this human unity. God thought this human
unity might be in opposition to his authority. So God confused their language and
they were forced to separate. Later God singled out his special people.

27 NISAN 3776

There is still a strong tradition of Abraham's presence here in Ur. In some ways the
people here are more faithful to the meaning of the covenant. They understand
that God's covenant goes beyond all sin. No matter how much we sin, we can
never destroy God's love. Maybe that is how the Essenes at Qumran came to
believe that baptism doesn't effect anything. It is God who converts. Will have to
think about that a bit.

7 TAMMUZ 3776

Back home. Valerius Gratus has made several changes in key offices. Has
appointed his second high priest.

18 TAMMUZ 3776

Our local rabbi told me the priests in Jerusalem are very upset with Valerius
Gratus.

4 SHEBAT 3776

Joseph died yesterday. He was a good man. He and mom become very close in his
last few months. Joseph always treated mom with respect. He saw her as a person,
not simply a wife or one who took care of his needs. We will miss him.

8 ELUL 3777

Haven't had much time to write. Didn't realize how much Joseph did for mom until I
had to do so many of the things he did. We've had another change in the high
priest in Jerusalem.

1 SIVAN 3778

Caiaphas was appointed high priest. He is the son in law of Annas. Looks like
Annas is still in charge.

9 TISHRI 3778

Essenes seem to be growing. At least they are becoming better known. In these
days of great unrest and political turmoil an escape to the desert seems inviting.

12 TISHRI 3778

Despite the strong anti-Rome sentiment I have met a few persons who are being
labelled "Herodians". They seem to favor Herod and Roman rule.

1 NISAN 3779

Plan to go to Jerusalem for Passover.



17 NISAN 3779

Big talk for Passover centered on Roman taxes. They now have a tax on land, one
on imported goods as well as the head tax. Several of our own people act as tax
collectors. They are regarded as traitors.

1 TISHRI 3779

I have been asked to join a group who will protest the Roman tax. I do not approve
of the taxes. However, I do not want to get into such a dispute and debate.

2 ADAR 3779

Some people are joining the Roman legion. If they join they automatically become
Roman citizens. This has great appeal to some people. These persons are also
seen as traitors. Anti-Roman sentiment seems to be growing.

16 NISAN 3780

A lot of tension at Passover. Several of the priests were stirring up anti-Rome
sentiment among the people. At the same time when Roman officials were around
they seem to be very docile and supportive of the Romans.

8 ADAR 3780

Have to be careful what I say and to whom I talk. Especially need to watch what I
write in this diary. It is hard to know whom I can trust.

17 NISAN 3781

Saw John at Passover. He has definitely decided to join the Essenes at Qumran.

26 SHEBAT 3783

Spent several months with John and the monks at Qumran. I admire them but that
is not for me.

20 NISAN 3785

Went to Jerusalem for Passover. The feast seems to have become more political
than religious. The tone of the feast has become increasingly the overthrowl of
Rome. I don't like it. I don't like the Roman rule any more than anyone else. But that
is not what the passover is about. Some leaders are calling for a new Moses to
lead us from the tyranny of Rome the same way Moses led our people out of Egypt.

19 ELUL 3786

The temple is finally completed. It took 46 years to build it. Is this a monument to
God or a monument to Herod?

28 ELUL 3786


Pontius Pilate is our new governor. His term of office did not get off to a good
start. He incurred the wrath of the people. Pilate had soldiers carry a bust of
himself through Jerusalem on the feast of atonement. The people regarded this
bust as an idol.

10 TISHRI 3786

John has left the Qumran group. I don't know what he will do.

25 TISHRI 3786

Heard that John has begun his own ministry of baptism.

6 SHEBAT 3786

Spent a week with John in the desert. John is starting to gather his own group of
dsiciples. I met several of them. Was impressed with them.

13 SHEBAT 3786

Received John's baptism. John would like me to carry on his work.

19 SHEBAT 3786

John could be in trouble. He is openly criticizing Herod for living with his brother's
wife.

1 ADAR 3786

Spent a few more days with John. Baptized a few people myself. Advised John not
to be so openly critical of Herod. I think his days are numbered.

29 ADAR 3786

Just as I thought. Herod has had John put in prison. We have to learn to
distinguish between the social evils in our society and the individual sins of
persons. There are enough social evils we need to speak out against without
attacking individuals for their weaknesses and sins.

6 NISAN 3787

Several followers of John approached me. They would like me to continue John's
ministry. John will probably never get out of prison.

1 SIVAN 3787

Spent forty days in retreat. Went to my favorite spot in the mountains. Have
decided to take up the ministry John began. It will be difficult. John was too
confrontative. I want to do more healing. People do not need to be reminded of
their sins. They need to know more of God's love and God's mercy.

Also, I do not want to remain in the desert and wait for people to come to me. I
want to go into the towns and villages and announce the good news of God's
presence.

16 SIVAN 3787

Started in Nazareth. Good response until someone starting talking about my family
background. Somehow they could not get beyond my childhood. Could not seem to
understand that one from their own town can lead them. Guess they are so used to
being told what to do by the priests in Jerusalem and by Roman officials. Somehow
every teacher has to come from somewhere else. Don't think I can do much good
in Nazareth. Need to go elsewhere.

29 TAMMUZ 3787

The ministry is very draining. Find myself spending more and more time on the
mountain to renew my strength. Understand now why John spent his time in the
desert.

18 ELUL 3787

Some people have discovered where I hang out in the mountains. Need to find a
new retreat.

1 TISHRI 3787

A large crowd gathered on the mountain today. They had lots of questions. The
people are really looking for something. A lot of those present were persons
regarded as outcasts. There are a lot of hurting people out there. I don't know if I
will have the strength to help them all.

18 TISHRI 3787

Knew it would come. Am meeting opposition from the scribes. In the past they
have been the only authority. They were the only ones who could read and write.
They wrote history, they wrote law. No one could question them.

As long as I was just an individual going about teaching and healing they were not
too concerned. Since the four fisherman began following me the scribes feel more
threatened.

23 TISHRI 3787

Crowds are getting larger and larger.

1 SHEBAT 3787

No way I can carry on this ministry alone. I need helpers. Need to start looking for
them.

3 SHEBAT 3787

Think I will ask the four fishermen who were disciples of John.

5 SHEBAT 3787

Andrew, Peter, and the two Zebedees agreed to help but they are somewhat
reluctant. Mr. Zebedee wasn't too happy losing his two sons. He thought they
would eventually take over the business.

22 SHEBAT 3787

The opposition is growing stronger. The pharisees and Saducees have now joined
in opposition to our work.

1 ADAR 3787

Levi, a tax collector came forward today to offer his help. All the anti-Roman
members of our group are upset.

5 ADAR 3787

Some members of my family came to ask me to stop preaching and healing.

7 ADAR 3787

Levi beginning to help. Still some opposition to him.

12 ADAR 3787

Need more helpers.

14 ADAR 3787

Spent the night on the mountain in prayer. Need to pick some more followers.

15 ADAR 3787

Tough decision. Decided to pick twelve. It's a good symbolic number. Israel had
twelve sons. They formed the original twelve tribes of Israel.

16 ADAR 3787

Uncertain about three of those picked.

Levi, I am ok with him. Just don't know how he will be accepted by the strong
anti-Roman faction.

Simon, pretty radical. He belonged to the Zealot party. Says he has abandoned the
party. But still talks like one.

Judas, most uncertain about him. In many ways I am attracted to him. There is just
something about him that makes me uneasy. Chose him because it is important to
have as diverse a group as possible. He may be able to reach people that others
might not be able to reach.

20 ADAR 3787

Sent the twelve out on their first mission alone. Had to be very harsh with them.
Perhaps I overstated my case but told them of the strong opposition they will
meet, especially from their own families.

25 ADAR 3787

While the twelve were out, I went around to their home towns and tried to soften
the opposition of their families. Zebedee was angry because his sons had
abandoned the family business. Some of their wives were afraid they would not be
able to support their families. A few questioned whether the group had the
psychological stability to meet the fierce opposition they will surely meet. Some
were just downright opposed to what we are doing. The most common question I
met was: "Who are you to think you can do this?"

It was hard to answer their doubts and their questions. I have the same doubts
and the same questions. The only argument I could use was to ask: "Are you happy
with your lives and the present social and religious environment in which you
live?" Virtually all of them said "NO!" So, I pointed out that someone needs to start
providing people with some kind of an alternative. "Someone has to do it!" I am
not sure that I convinced them but they did not attempt to refute my argument.

27 ADAR 3787

Opposition even stronger. Seems that the more followers I send out, the stronger
the opposition gets.

13 SIWAN 3788

Opposition getting mean.

4 TAMMUZ 3788

Had a dream last night that I might die.

6 TAMMUZ 3788

Met a woman yesterday named Magdalene. Seems to be a really troubled person.
Am somewhat afraid of her.

8 TAMMUZ 3788

Was told that Magdalene was possessed by the devil.

11 TAMMUZ 3788

Can't be afraid of Magdelene. Must remember the power of the Father that is in me.

15 TAMMUZ 3788

Realize now that Magdelene is searching. Need to help her.

1 ELUL 3788

Spent two days on the mountain asking the Father's help in dealing with
Magdalene.

3 ELUL 3788

Not just one. I drove seven devils out of Magdalene. Each one seemed to fight
harder than the previous one. Each one was harder for her. She wanted to rid
herself of each one. However, there was a part of her that had become so
attached to each one that it seemed almost impossible for her to let go.

2 TISHRI 3788

Haven't seen Magdalene for a week. James told me she has been sick in bed for a
week.

7 TISHRI 3788

Members of my family came by again. This time they tried to prove I was demented
and force officials to detain me.

14 TISHRI 3788

Went by to see Magdelene today. She is still very withdrawn. I realize now that it is
not enough to drive out demons. I have to give persons like Magdelene some kind
of hope, something positive to direct their lives.

15 TISHRI 3788

Invited Magdelene to help us in our ministry. It is risky. She may not be stable
because of her demoniac possession. She may be too depressed and may need
more help than she can give. Some of the men may be unhappy with a woman
helping us. Her presence will give fuel to the opposition. Still I think she will be a
great asset to us.

Plan to take a two week tour into Samaria. Told Magdalene to think about my offer
and give me an answer when I get back.

19 TISHRI 3788

Bad mistake yesterday. Compared myself to the "Son of Man" used in one of
Daniel's prophecies. Now everyone wants to pin that title on me. The Sanhedrin
interprets it in its most formal sense. The "son of man" was the one who would
destroy the four beasts in Daniel's dream. The four beasts are commonly
interpreted as the foreign powers that control lands around Israel. I've already
been reported to Roman officials.

21 TISHRI 3788

Simon, Judas and the other Zealots in our group are delighted by my reference to
the "son of man". They want to raise an army.

25 TISHRI 3788

Even the ordinary members of our group like the "son of man" reference. They
see it as a good image catcher. They suggest we are waging a spiritual warfare
against the pagan nations around us. I can see their point but don't want to get
stuck with that image. Wish I hadn't used it. It is one I will probably never live down.

3 SHEBAT 3788

Had an interesting experience in Samaria. Was travelling through the town of
Sychar. Stopped to rest at Jacob's well. The disciples went to get food and I
wanted to rest and reflect on our heritage and tradition. What better place to do
that than at an historic site such as Jacob's well. Was wondering what things were
like here in the time of Jacob. Also reflecting on how I could best keep and
preserve our long great heritage and tradition.

During that reflection a Samaritan woman approached to draw water. It struck me
that she and the Samaritans were an important part of that great tradition. I
thought back to my pilgrimage to Babylon and how our people there had remained
so faithful to our tradition even though they had married outside our religious
family. I was thinking that the same was true of the Samaritans. They were sons and
daughters of Abraham just like us.

Then this woman approached. I signalled to her to go ahead and draw her water.
She hesitated. Social custom tells her not to recognize a man in public and never
associate with a Jew. She seemed really fearful. So I told her I was thirsty and
asked her for a drink. That really threw her.

Eventually we were able to talk. It turned out she had been divorced five times
and was living with a sixth man. When I was willing to forgive her, all the social
barriers seemed to drop.

Some of the disciples were upset because I talked with her. Judas said "You're
just asking for trouble!"

6 SHEBAT 3788

Guess who showed up today? The Samaritan woman. She brought her whole town
with her. They invited me to come to their town for a few days. Judas and some of
the other disciples didn't want to go. Sent them on to the Decapolis to preach.

15 SHEBAT 3788

A very successful mission. Thanks in large part to the woman. Was so busy never
did get a chance to ask her what her name is. Realize now how important it is to
make women a part of my ministry. Hope Magdalene says yes.

27 SHEBAT 3788

Magdalene did say "yes". I'm glad, She seemed very excited.

2 ADAR 3788

Several women have joined in our ministry. Magdelene, the wife of Herod's
steward, Mrs. Zebedee and several others.

12 ADAR 3788

Although he won't admit it, I suspect Judas is a Zealot at heart. He wants me (us) to
be strong politically. I think his major goal is overthrowing the Romans.

27 ADAR 3788

Attacks by religious leaders are becoming more intense. The main reasons for the
attacks are women in our ministry, association with Samaritans, association with
tax collectors - even involving them in our ministry, and breaking the Sabbath
rules.

11 SIWAN 3789

Had a second dream that I will be killed.

6 TAMMUZ 3789

Need more help. Picked a group of seventy two followers and sent them out. Told
them to keep the message simple: The kingdom of God is here. Asked them to be
sensitive to the needs of the people.

25 TAMMUZ 3789

The seventy two returned all excited. Very successful mission.

1
5 ELUL 3789

JOHN KILLED

16 ELUL 3789

Gave everyone a few days off and came up to the mountain. It is hard to imagine
that a young girl would ask for John's head on a platter. It is hard for me to
concentrate. I feel such sadness and grief for John. He was so good a person. I am
not sure which is my stronger sentiment anger or sorrow.

30 ELUL 3789

Spent more time on the mountain than I had anticipated. Apparently my
sadness/anger was much deeper than I realized. Need to get back to work or will
grieve myself to death.

1 TISHRI 3789

Didn't have to go back. The crowds found me. Many of them were followers of
John. I realized that I really needed to forgive. The only real value in recalling a
difficult past is that it allows us the opportunity to forgive. That is a very hard
concept for the disciples to understand.

They wanted to dismiss the crowds and go off and talk about our work. I told them
they needed to feed the crowd. It is not enough for us to forgive, we have to reach
out to others in their need. The disciples were amazed when they realized there
was food left over. We have more than enough resources to help others. We do
not need to send them elsewhere.

2 TISHRI 3787

Last night we had a long talk about the events of the day. I think we all realized
that all of us are enriched when we forgive others. Hope that lesson holds.

3 TISHRI 3789

Word from Rome is that Tiberius has uncovered a plot to kill him.

8 TISHRI 3789

A real reign of terror has began because of the fear and anger of Tiberius.

17 TISHRI 3789

Treason trials now abound in Rome. Talk they may extend to the provinces like
ours.

19 SHEBAT 3789

Met a humorous person today, Zaccheus. Just a little guy. I was passing through
Jericho and he climbed up a tree so he could see me. Had supper with him. He is a
tax collector. He and Levi hit it off well. Zaccheus wants to change his life style.

19 ADAR 3789

Am becoming more fearful about Judas. He was very upset because I went to
Zaccheus' house. One of the disciples suggested that he might be dipping in to
the common purse.

1 NISAN 3790

One of the few friends I have among the high priests has told me that the
Pharisees and Sadducees plan to use the fear and obsession of Tiberius to do me
in. They have begun recording my movements and reporting them to Roman
officials.

4 NISAN 3790

More and more Pharisees, Sadducees, and Scribes are showing up wherever I go.
The are asking leading questions, trying to get me to say something they can use
against me.

6 NISAN 3790

Tried to get me to say we should not pay taxes to Rome. The hypocrites resent the
tax and try to present me as someone who is so bad because he is against the tax.

7 NISAN 3790

Tried to get me to berate certain parts of the law.

8 NISAN 3790

Questioned me on divorce and other matter. Felt like I was on trial.

In his last few days and hours Jesus did not have the leisure to add to his diary.
His diary was found by Magdalene after Jesus' death. She dictated the following
events and dates to Levi as a conclusion to Jesus' diary.


12 NISAN 3790

Most of Jesus' "trial" was held at night. Apart from the Sanhedrin there were not
many persons who even knew about the trial. Peter managed to get close but had
to leave. He was afraid they might seize him and try to force him to witness against
Jesus or even put him on trial also.

Peter was able to supply me with the following facts of the trial. Judas received
money to monitor Jesus' movements, lead the soldiers out to make the arrest, and
identify Jesus to the soldiers. The members of the Sanhedrin did not want to be
involved in any way with Jesus' arrest. They wanted it to appear as a Roman action
in view of Jesus' treason.

Peter suggests that part of Judas' depression and suicide was Jesus was turned
over to the Romans. Judas was very anti-Roman. He would like to have seen Jesus
come out against the Romans.

13 NISAN 3790

The Sanhedrin sent Jesus to Pilate who in turn sent him to Herod. Herod sent
Jesus back to Pilate. Much pressure was put on Pilate until he finally sentenced
Jesus to death. Jesus was presented to Pilate as an enemy of Caesar, one who
claimed to be King of the Jews. The Sanhedrin treathened to report Pilate to
Tiberius Caesar as an enemy of Caesar. If Pilate failed to punish someone who had
ambitions to be a king then he was a traitor to Caesar. Pilate had Jesus publicly
mocked and beaten. But the Sanhedrin pushed for his death.

THE REST OF THE NARRATIVE WAS THE PERSONAL WITNESS OF MAGDALENE
HERSELF.

The Sanhedrin managed to rouse a large crowd of people who were hostile to
Jesus. They even brought out visitors who were in town for the Passover. Many of
these people never heard of Jesus but were paid money to offer hostile remarks
against Jesus. None of his closest followers were present. The only friends of
Jesus in the crowd were a few women followers. They were unable to get very
close because of the crowd of hostile persons.

Jesus did not linger very long on the cross. He died very quickly. One member of
the Sanhedrin, Joseph from the town of Arimethea, asked for Jesus' body so he
could bury it in his own tomb. Pilate was surprised that Jesus had died so quickly.
He sent one of the members of the Roman Legion to certify that Jesus was dead.
Jesus appeared to be dead so the soldier thrust a lance into Jesus' side. When
the body failed to react to the blow and the last drop of blood came out, he was
able to certify that Jesus had died.

Persons who joined the Roman Legion automatically became Roman citizens. The
soldier who pierced Jesus' side was a young man from Nazareth. He had been an
early admirer of Jesus. He even thought of being a follower of Jesus. But the
allurement of Roman citizenship and a better life style were too great for him.

I observed where he was buried so I could go and anoint his body at the first
opportunity.

14 NISAN 3790

There was a very somber mood at the Passover today. Few people seemed in the
mood for celebrating. It was more like a funeral than a religious festival.

Although most of the priests seemed content and happy, they were unable to
express it because the crowds might have rioted. Roman soldiers were visible
everywhere. Although I did not see him, it was rumored that even Pilate himself
was out on patrol so there would be no demonstrations or riots.

15 NISAN 3790

Went at sunrise to his tomb. We hoped to anoint his body. Wondered how we
would get in. It was a very large stone they had used to enclose the tomb. It took
eight men to put the stone in place. There were only four of us women.

To our surprise the stone had been moved. There was an opening in the tomb.
Wanted to go in but we were afraid. Wondered if someone else had come to anoint
the body. Joanna yelled "hello". That awful hollow echo of her voice. Salome yelled
a firmer "Who's there?" Again that hollow echo.

We didn't know what to do. Someone had obviously been here. The tomb was
open. We decided to go in. To our dismay the body was gone. We could only
assume someone had come and stolen the body. We looked all around the garden
for any kind of clue: footprints, discarded material, anything that would indicate
someone had been here. Nothing! Now we were really confused.

The other women went off to see if they could find Peter or some of the men. I did
not want to leave the site. About fifteen minutes after they left I saw someone
coming toward me. I thought he might be the caretaker of the grounds. I pleaded
with him. "Sir, please, if you know where they have laid Jesus tell me so I can go
and anoint his body." He smiled and said "Hello, Mary." When he spoke my name I
realized that it was Jesus and that he was alive.

I guess I became so excited that I almost crushed him. I could not believe he was
alive. When he finally got me to let him go and got me calmed down he said. "I am
alive and I am real. My body is no longer like the one you knew a few days ago. I
will be able to be many places at the same time. One day when you die and your
body is transformed and resurrected, you will understand all of this. But for now,
try to get Peter and the other followers to believe. It is only by faith that you can
experience my living presence."

And then he disappeared. Almost as quickly as he had come. I was in ecstacy for a
few minutes. Then in shock. Then I began to doubt. Was this an illusion? Did I
really see Jesus or did I simply imagine it? From ecstacy I fell into doubt and was
on the verge of despair.

Then Joanna and Salome returned very excited. They had the same experience.
We sought out Mary the mother of James and Joses. She too had seen Jesus and
he had given her the same message.

We found Peter and the other disciples locked up in the room where they had
gathered with Jesus the night before he died. None of them had any sense of what
had happened. You could see they wanted to believe but it was so hard. Finally I
told Peter; "Don't take our word. Come and see for yourself."

All the way out to the tomb Peter talked excitedly. He didn't make a lot of sense. He
just talked. He was obviously frightened. Peter saw the empty tomb but did not
experience the risen Jesus. I told Peter; "Jesus told me that it is only by faith that
we will be able to see him."

Peter was obviously shaken. On the way home he did not say a word. The whole
day passed. That evening when the men were gathered together, they were able
to experience the risen Jesus.

Later Peter told me that he asked Jesus why it took so long for them to experience
Jesus' resurrection and we woman had done so almost immediately. This was the
answer Peter said the Lord had given him.

"Well, Peter, the woman were thinking about me. They did not come out looking for
some great miracle. They came to do that last act of human kindness and love for a
person they loved. Their minds and hearts were focused on me not on
themselves. They had no fear of anyone trying to stop them. They did not think of
any possible adverse effects for themselves. They had no guilt about my death.
They came simply because they loved me.

You men, on the other hand, were still feeling guilt because you ran away and
deserted me. You were still thinking about what might happen to you. You were
wondering about your future. Part of your talk this morning was about whether you
should go back to your boats.

I am no longer here among you as a man like I have been for these last several
months. I have been freed from the body. I am here as a pure spirit. I am no longer
held back by the limitations of the body. You can only experience my presence
when you allow yourselves to be freed from the worries and the limitations of your
body.

My resurrection means you are freed from all sin. It means you have nothing to
fear. As I told you when I first appeared to you 'The sins you forgive, are forgiven.
The sins you retain, are retained.' The sins which most need forgiveness are your
own.

The women had all experienced forgiveness in their lives and had allowed
themselves to be forgiven. It is not enough for me to forgive you. You have to
allow yourself to be forgiven. One of the reasons I was killed was the religious
leaders did not want to allow themselves or the people to be forgiven, Somehow
they feel like they will lose power over the people if they allow the people to be
forgiven.

You are now the religious leaders. Please do not make the same mistake. Allow
yourselves and allow the people to be forgiven. My life, my death, my resurrection
means all sins have been forgiven, even those you think are most serious."

End of Jesus' diary.

There is another fictional diary. It is that of Conaniah, a fictional person who lived
at the time of Jesus Christ. It describes some of his thoughts about Jesus. To
begin reading this diary press
TO CONTINUE

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