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THE DIARY OF JESUS This is an imaginary diary of Jesus. It attempts to focus on the events that happened in Rome and in Jerusalem during the lifetime of Jesus. These are all events that would have made an impact on Jesus and his ministry. The calendar uses dates from the Jewish calendar. Our own calendar is a few years off. According to this calendar Jesus was born in the year 6 BC. The year 1 AD in the calendar is the year 3761. 24 NISAN 3766 (10th year of Herod Antipas reign) Mom and dad were quite upset with me. I guess I just got carried away and didn't realize how late it was. By the time I did it was impossible for me to try and find them. The best thing was to stay in the temple and let them find me. But they did not see it that way. Several of the teachers in the temple wanted me to stay and study there. Mom and dad would not hear of that. As we were leaving, BarDaniel, one of the teachers, suggested that I keep a diary of my thoughts, my questions, and my experiences. This is my first try. WHAT DID I LEARN FROM THIS EXPERIENCE? I don't just live for myself. I affect others, need to be more aware of how little things I do affect others. FOLLOWING SABBATH Felt strange at the synagogue today. I think word is out about what happened in Jerusalem. No one talked to me. I heard mom and dad talking later. They felt the same isolation. SIX MONTHS LATER It has been difficult to write. I don't even like to think about it. Life here at home has become more normal. We have come closer together as a family. That is the only way we have been able to survive. Everyone seems to avoid us. Heard there is a new high priest, Annas. 8 SHEBAT 3767 Joseph told me today that when I was about two years old he and mom had to take me to Egypt because my life was threatened. Joseph still seems upset when he talks about it. It really sounds like a wild tale. 12 ADAR 3767 Have been talking to many of the elders of the community. As strange as it seems Joseph's story is probably true. I'm not sure Herod was out to get me specifically. Apparently he was some kind of maniac. He had almost all of his children killed. Why would he take so much care to send them to Rome so they would receive a good education and then bring them home and have them killed? 14 ADAR Joseph says Herod was a maniac. He doesn't seem to want to talk about it. Or maybe he is just such a good person that he cannot understand someone like Herod. 24 ADAR Still thinking about Herod killing his children. I need to forget it and think about something else. 19 NISAN 3768 Met the new high priest Annas. I don't trust him. 1 SIVAN 3768 Realize now why I don't trust Annas. He was appointed by the Roman procurator. He owes his office to the Romans. Yet when he is among the people he is constantly berating the Romans. He certainly had to do something to win their pleasure. Which is the true Annas? 3 SIVAN How can our religious leaders be faithful to the covenant when they are directed by the Romans? 10 SIVAN Joseph says I ask too many questions. 12 SIVAN Was rereading my diary. Couldn't help but notice the ending of my first entry: "I don't just live for myself. I affect others, need to be more aware of how little things I do affect others." Better stop asking so many questions. I don't want to hurt mom or dad. 5 ELUL 3769 It has been over a year since I have written in my diary. I will soon be fifteen years old. Joseph wants me to take over the business. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't really think that is what I want to do. 10 ADAR 3770 Have been taking over more and more control of the business. However, my heart is not in it. 12 VEADAR 3770 We have an extra month this year. Seven times every nineteen years we add an extra month. One of the teachers explained that we have 354 days in our year. We have alternating months of 30 days and 29 days. We would be celebrating the summer feasts in the cold months and the winter feasts in the warm months if we didn't make some kind of an adjustment. 23 NISAN 3770 Saw John at Passover. He is having same problem as I. Zachary expects John to succeed him as priest and John doesn't want to do it. His dad regards him as a rebel. John is not at all happy with what he sees among the priests. John and I need to get together and talk. 12 SHEBAT 3770 Has been almost ten months since I wrote in this diary. It is so difficult. If I write then I have difficulty concentrating on my work. If I do not write then there is a tension, a sense that I am neglecting something very important. I wish I had never started this diary. 23 NISAN 3771 Spent a few days after Passover with John. There is little room for persons of our age in temple thought or temple activity. If we were willing to go and learn set questions and set answers we would be accepted. If we ask a different set of questions we are ignored and rejected. John is especially disliked because he is reluctant to pursue the training necessary to follow his father's footsteps as a priest. 3 SIVAN 3771 It has taken 30 years to build the temple and it is nowhere near complete. It has taken a lot of money and has much slave labor. WHY? 6 ELUL 3771 Got into an argument with our local rabbi over the temple. It seems that almost anyone connected with the local synagogues or the temple is in support of Herod Antipas. At least they will not speak out publicly. 12 SHEBAT 3771 There is a group who opposes the Romans. It is the Zealot party. They are against any Roman intervention: taxation, census, anything which recognizes Roman jurisdiction. They have a bad name. They raid and they kill. They will even kill Jews whom they think co-operate with the Romans. 18 NISAN 3772 John was telling me of several groups who have formed out in various desert areas. They have simply abandoned our entire political and religious system. They live very solitary lives. They live in caves. However, they do come together to pray, to eat, and to share the results of their study. John seems interested in the group. I don't think I would like such a solitary and desolate life. 12 TISHRI 3772 Have heard from several others about the hermits in the desert. One group lives near Qumran out by the Dead Sea. They are trying to preserve some of the writings of the prophets. These hermits are very anti Roman. They don't seem to be warriors like the Zealots. 11 TISHRI 3773 Joseph is not well. He is a good man. 13 TISHRI 3773 Joseph seems to be failing. 14 TISHRI 3773 Joseph told me today that he thought I had great power. He asked me to touch him and pray over him. 15 TISHRI 3773 Felt very weak today. That prayer over Joseph took a lot out of me. 16 TISHRI 3773 Joseph seems to be getting stronger. 22 TISHRI 3773 Joseph was able to work in the shop for a few hours today. 4 ADAR 3773 Joseph has been fully recovered for several weeks. 16 ADAR 3773 Found another group with whom I might have some quarrels, Scribes. In many places they are the only persons who can read and write. They write the history. No one knows whether what they write is true or not. They write the law. They interpret the law. They even act as judges. Many of them are also Pharisees. They have a lot of power. There is usually no one who can challenge them. 18 NISAN 3774 At Passover, much of the talk in Jerusalem was about Caesar Augustus. He is now 76 years old. People are beginning to talk about his death and what will happen when he dies. Augustus has not appeared in public for several weeks. He has asked for his stepson, Tiberius, to be named as the co-emperor with him. One thing which seems certain is that with a new emperor Annas will be replaced as high priest. 19 NISAN 3774 Had a difficult time at Passover. Got into several arguments with different members of the Pharisees. They are so fixed on the law. I know we need laws. But they exist for the good of people. Sometimes I think many of the Pharisees believe the law is more important than people. I can foresee having difficulty with them later in life. Several of them told me I will change some of my "foolish" ideas when I "mature". 29 SIVAN 3774 Heard today that Caesar Augustus did not read the renewal of the promises of his office. He asked Tiberius to read them for him. He was supposed to have said that he would not be around to fulfill them. Tiberius would be. Seems pretty certain that Tiberius will be the new emperor. 11 TISHRI 3774 Caesar Augustus has died. Tiberius has succeeded him. 3 SHEBAT 3774 Tiberius Caesar has named Valerius Gratus as new procurator. 12 SHEBAT 3774 When Valerius Gratus became procurator Annas was forced to resign as high priest. A good start. 19 NISAN 3775 A lot of turmoil among the priests. They really resent the power of the procurator to appoint the high priest. Several of them didn't particularly like Annas. They just don't like Roman puppets selecting their leader. As a reult of this action of Valerius Gratus, John has definitely decided he will not follow in his father's footsteps as priest. 2 SIVAN 3775 I need to get away and clear my head. I want to take a pilgrimage and try to retrace my religious roots. Want to go to Ur where Father Abraham first begin his journey. Then to Babylon where so many persons abandoned our religious practises. 20 SIVAN 3775 Spent several days at Qumran. Decided to begin my pilgrimage here. Very impressed with the monks. I especially admire their dedication, the simplicity of their lives, and their complete dedication to studying and copying the writings of the prophets, especially Isaiah. Many of the local rabbis do not favor the writings of Isaiah. In their view Isaiah should have attacked the Babylonians not the Israelites. Monks at Qumran practise a ritual called baptism. 27 SIVAN 3775 Ended up staying an extra week at Qumran. Was really intrigued by their ceremony of baptism. Had heard of it before. Some local rabbis use it as a ceremony to receive non Jews into their synagogue. The Qumran group sees baptism only as a sign. It does not effect anything. They believe only God can cleanse. Baptism is a sign that the person has already been converted to God. 13 TISHRI 3775 Met many of my own people here in Babylon. Many stayed here after the time of exile. Many married Babylonians. Over the centuries since the end of the exile our blood lines have become mixed. Some have abandoned their religious tradition but most have remained faithful. 19 TISHRI 3775 Am deeply impressed by the hospitality of my people here. There is a much different attitude here than in Jerusalem. People here know that God will be with his people wherever they are. It is not necessary to be in our own land. There is also a great sense that God is the God of all peoples, not just a select few. It has been a marvelous experience. Would like to stay. 20 NISAN 3776 Am back to roots of Abraham. Here in Ur in the land of Chaldea. Very barren land. Can see why Abraham left and sought a new land. Some of our most ancient religious legends started here (the flood and the tower of babel). Saw the ruins of an ancient structure which date from about the year 1650 (2100 years ago). This story has become essential to our religious belief. In the story the world was a single people. God was troubled by this human unity. God thought this human unity might be in opposition to his authority. So God confused their language and they were forced to separate. Later God singled out his special people. 27 NISAN 3776 There is still a strong tradition of Abraham's presence here in Ur. In some ways the people here are more faithful to the meaning of the covenant. They understand that God's covenant goes beyond all sin. No matter how much we sin, we can never destroy God's love. Maybe that is how the Essenes at Qumran came to believe that baptism doesn't effect anything. It is God who converts. Will have to think about that a bit. 7 TAMMUZ 3776 Back home. Valerius Gratus has made several changes in key offices. Has appointed his second high priest. 18 TAMMUZ 3776 Our local rabbi told me the priests in Jerusalem are very upset with Valerius Gratus. 4 SHEBAT 3776 Joseph died yesterday. He was a good man. He and mom become very close in his last few months. Joseph always treated mom with respect. He saw her as a person, not simply a wife or one who took care of his needs. We will miss him. 8 ELUL 3777 Haven't had much time to write. Didn't realize how much Joseph did for mom until I had to do so many of the things he did. We've had another change in the high priest in Jerusalem. 1 SIVAN 3778 Caiaphas was appointed high priest. He is the son in law of Annas. Looks like Annas is still in charge. 9 TISHRI 3778 Essenes seem to be growing. At least they are becoming better known. In these days of great unrest and political turmoil an escape to the desert seems inviting. 12 TISHRI 3778 Despite the strong anti-Rome sentiment I have met a few persons who are being labelled "Herodians". They seem to favor Herod and Roman rule. 1 NISAN 3779 Plan to go to Jerusalem for Passover. 17 NISAN 3779 Big talk for Passover centered on Roman taxes. They now have a tax on land, one on imported goods as well as the head tax. Several of our own people act as tax collectors. They are regarded as traitors. 1 TISHRI 3779 I have been asked to join a group who will protest the Roman tax. I do not approve of the taxes. However, I do not want to get into such a dispute and debate. 2 ADAR 3779 Some people are joining the Roman legion. If they join they automatically become Roman citizens. This has great appeal to some people. These persons are also seen as traitors. Anti-Roman sentiment seems to be growing. 16 NISAN 3780 A lot of tension at Passover. Several of the priests were stirring up anti-Rome sentiment among the people. At the same time when Roman officials were around they seem to be very docile and supportive of the Romans. 8 ADAR 3780 Have to be careful what I say and to whom I talk. Especially need to watch what I write in this diary. It is hard to know whom I can trust. 17 NISAN 3781 Saw John at Passover. He has definitely decided to join the Essenes at Qumran. 26 SHEBAT 3783 Spent several months with John and the monks at Qumran. I admire them but that is not for me. 20 NISAN 3785 Went to Jerusalem for Passover. The feast seems to have become more political than religious. The tone of the feast has become increasingly the overthrowl of Rome. I don't like it. I don't like the Roman rule any more than anyone else. But that is not what the passover is about. Some leaders are calling for a new Moses to lead us from the tyranny of Rome the same way Moses led our people out of Egypt. 19 ELUL 3786 The temple is finally completed. It took 46 years to build it. Is this a monument to God or a monument to Herod? 28 ELUL 3786 Pontius Pilate is our new governor. His term of office did not get off to a good start. He incurred the wrath of the people. Pilate had soldiers carry a bust of himself through Jerusalem on the feast of atonement. The people regarded this bust as an idol. 10 TISHRI 3786 John has left the Qumran group. I don't know what he will do. 25 TISHRI 3786 Heard that John has begun his own ministry of baptism. 6 SHEBAT 3786 Spent a week with John in the desert. John is starting to gather his own group of dsiciples. I met several of them. Was impressed with them. 13 SHEBAT 3786 Received John's baptism. John would like me to carry on his work. 19 SHEBAT 3786 John could be in trouble. He is openly criticizing Herod for living with his brother's wife. 1 ADAR 3786 Spent a few more days with John. Baptized a few people myself. Advised John not to be so openly critical of Herod. I think his days are numbered. 29 ADAR 3786 Just as I thought. Herod has had John put in prison. We have to learn to distinguish between the social evils in our society and the individual sins of persons. There are enough social evils we need to speak out against without attacking individuals for their weaknesses and sins. 6 NISAN 3787 Several followers of John approached me. They would like me to continue John's ministry. John will probably never get out of prison. 1 SIVAN 3787 Spent forty days in retreat. Went to my favorite spot in the mountains. Have decided to take up the ministry John began. It will be difficult. John was too confrontative. I want to do more healing. People do not need to be reminded of their sins. They need to know more of God's love and God's mercy. Also, I do not want to remain in the desert and wait for people to come to me. I want to go into the towns and villages and announce the good news of God's presence. 16 SIVAN 3787 Started in Nazareth. Good response until someone starting talking about my family background. Somehow they could not get beyond my childhood. Could not seem to understand that one from their own town can lead them. Guess they are so used to being told what to do by the priests in Jerusalem and by Roman officials. Somehow every teacher has to come from somewhere else. Don't think I can do much good in Nazareth. Need to go elsewhere. 29 TAMMUZ 3787 The ministry is very draining. Find myself spending more and more time on the mountain to renew my strength. Understand now why John spent his time in the desert. 18 ELUL 3787 Some people have discovered where I hang out in the mountains. Need to find a new retreat. 1 TISHRI 3787 A large crowd gathered on the mountain today. They had lots of questions. The people are really looking for something. A lot of those present were persons regarded as outcasts. There are a lot of hurting people out there. I don't know if I will have the strength to help them all. 18 TISHRI 3787 Knew it would come. Am meeting opposition from the scribes. In the past they have been the only authority. They were the only ones who could read and write. They wrote history, they wrote law. No one could question them. As long as I was just an individual going about teaching and healing they were not too concerned. Since the four fisherman began following me the scribes feel more threatened. 23 TISHRI 3787 Crowds are getting larger and larger. 1 SHEBAT 3787 No way I can carry on this ministry alone. I need helpers. Need to start looking for them. 3 SHEBAT 3787 Think I will ask the four fishermen who were disciples of John. 5 SHEBAT 3787 Andrew, Peter, and the two Zebedees agreed to help but they are somewhat reluctant. Mr. Zebedee wasn't too happy losing his two sons. He thought they would eventually take over the business. 22 SHEBAT 3787 The opposition is growing stronger. The pharisees and Saducees have now joined in opposition to our work. 1 ADAR 3787 Levi, a tax collector came forward today to offer his help. All the anti-Roman members of our group are upset. 5 ADAR 3787 Some members of my family came to ask me to stop preaching and healing. 7 ADAR 3787 Levi beginning to help. Still some opposition to him. 12 ADAR 3787 Need more helpers. 14 ADAR 3787 Spent the night on the mountain in prayer. Need to pick some more followers. 15 ADAR 3787 Tough decision. Decided to pick twelve. It's a good symbolic number. Israel had twelve sons. They formed the original twelve tribes of Israel. 16 ADAR 3787 Uncertain about three of those picked. Levi, I am ok with him. Just don't know how he will be accepted by the strong anti-Roman faction. Simon, pretty radical. He belonged to the Zealot party. Says he has abandoned the party. But still talks like one. Judas, most uncertain about him. In many ways I am attracted to him. There is just something about him that makes me uneasy. Chose him because it is important to have as diverse a group as possible. He may be able to reach people that others might not be able to reach. 20 ADAR 3787 Sent the twelve out on their first mission alone. Had to be very harsh with them. Perhaps I overstated my case but told them of the strong opposition they will meet, especially from their own families. 25 ADAR 3787 While the twelve were out, I went around to their home towns and tried to soften the opposition of their families. Zebedee was angry because his sons had abandoned the family business. Some of their wives were afraid they would not be able to support their families. A few questioned whether the group had the psychological stability to meet the fierce opposition they will surely meet. Some were just downright opposed to what we are doing. The most common question I met was: "Who are you to think you can do this?" It was hard to answer their doubts and their questions. I have the same doubts and the same questions. The only argument I could use was to ask: "Are you happy with your lives and the present social and religious environment in which you live?" Virtually all of them said "NO!" So, I pointed out that someone needs to start providing people with some kind of an alternative. "Someone has to do it!" I am not sure that I convinced them but they did not attempt to refute my argument. 27 ADAR 3787 Opposition even stronger. Seems that the more followers I send out, the stronger the opposition gets. 13 SIWAN 3788 Opposition getting mean. 4 TAMMUZ 3788 Had a dream last night that I might die. 6 TAMMUZ 3788 Met a woman yesterday named Magdalene. Seems to be a really troubled person. Am somewhat afraid of her. 8 TAMMUZ 3788 Was told that Magdalene was possessed by the devil. 11 TAMMUZ 3788 Can't be afraid of Magdelene. Must remember the power of the Father that is in me. 15 TAMMUZ 3788 Realize now that Magdelene is searching. Need to help her. 1 ELUL 3788 Spent two days on the mountain asking the Father's help in dealing with Magdalene. 3 ELUL 3788 Not just one. I drove seven devils out of Magdalene. Each one seemed to fight harder than the previous one. Each one was harder for her. She wanted to rid herself of each one. However, there was a part of her that had become so attached to each one that it seemed almost impossible for her to let go. 2 TISHRI 3788 Haven't seen Magdalene for a week. James told me she has been sick in bed for a week. 7 TISHRI 3788 Members of my family came by again. This time they tried to prove I was demented and force officials to detain me. 14 TISHRI 3788 Went by to see Magdelene today. She is still very withdrawn. I realize now that it is not enough to drive out demons. I have to give persons like Magdelene some kind of hope, something positive to direct their lives. 15 TISHRI 3788 Invited Magdelene to help us in our ministry. It is risky. She may not be stable because of her demoniac possession. She may be too depressed and may need more help than she can give. Some of the men may be unhappy with a woman helping us. Her presence will give fuel to the opposition. Still I think she will be a great asset to us. Plan to take a two week tour into Samaria. Told Magdalene to think about my offer and give me an answer when I get back. 19 TISHRI 3788 Bad mistake yesterday. Compared myself to the "Son of Man" used in one of Daniel's prophecies. Now everyone wants to pin that title on me. The Sanhedrin interprets it in its most formal sense. The "son of man" was the one who would destroy the four beasts in Daniel's dream. The four beasts are commonly interpreted as the foreign powers that control lands around Israel. I've already been reported to Roman officials. 21 TISHRI 3788 Simon, Judas and the other Zealots in our group are delighted by my reference to the "son of man". They want to raise an army. 25 TISHRI 3788 Even the ordinary members of our group like the "son of man" reference. They see it as a good image catcher. They suggest we are waging a spiritual warfare against the pagan nations around us. I can see their point but don't want to get stuck with that image. Wish I hadn't used it. It is one I will probably never live down. 3 SHEBAT 3788 Had an interesting experience in Samaria. Was travelling through the town of Sychar. Stopped to rest at Jacob's well. The disciples went to get food and I wanted to rest and reflect on our heritage and tradition. What better place to do that than at an historic site such as Jacob's well. Was wondering what things were like here in the time of Jacob. Also reflecting on how I could best keep and preserve our long great heritage and tradition. During that reflection a Samaritan woman approached to draw water. It struck me that she and the Samaritans were an important part of that great tradition. I thought back to my pilgrimage to Babylon and how our people there had remained so faithful to our tradition even though they had married outside our religious family. I was thinking that the same was true of the Samaritans. They were sons and daughters of Abraham just like us. Then this woman approached. I signalled to her to go ahead and draw her water. She hesitated. Social custom tells her not to recognize a man in public and never associate with a Jew. She seemed really fearful. So I told her I was thirsty and asked her for a drink. That really threw her. Eventually we were able to talk. It turned out she had been divorced five times and was living with a sixth man. When I was willing to forgive her, all the social barriers seemed to drop. Some of the disciples were upset because I talked with her. Judas said "You're just asking for trouble!" 6 SHEBAT 3788 Guess who showed up today? The Samaritan woman. She brought her whole town with her. They invited me to come to their town for a few days. Judas and some of the other disciples didn't want to go. Sent them on to the Decapolis to preach. 15 SHEBAT 3788 A very successful mission. Thanks in large part to the woman. Was so busy never did get a chance to ask her what her name is. Realize now how important it is to make women a part of my ministry. Hope Magdalene says yes. 27 SHEBAT 3788 Magdalene did say "yes". I'm glad, She seemed very excited. 2 ADAR 3788 Several women have joined in our ministry. Magdelene, the wife of Herod's steward, Mrs. Zebedee and several others. 12 ADAR 3788 Although he won't admit it, I suspect Judas is a Zealot at heart. He wants me (us) to be strong politically. I think his major goal is overthrowing the Romans. 27 ADAR 3788 Attacks by religious leaders are becoming more intense. The main reasons for the attacks are women in our ministry, association with Samaritans, association with tax collectors - even involving them in our ministry, and breaking the Sabbath rules. 11 SIWAN 3789 Had a second dream that I will be killed. 6 TAMMUZ 3789 Need more help. Picked a group of seventy two followers and sent them out. Told them to keep the message simple: The kingdom of God is here. Asked them to be sensitive to the needs of the people. 25 TAMMUZ 3789 The seventy two returned all excited. Very successful mission. 15 ELUL 3789 JOHN KILLED 16 ELUL 3789 Gave everyone a few days off and came up to the mountain. It is hard to imagine that a young girl would ask for John's head on a platter. It is hard for me to concentrate. I feel such sadness and grief for John. He was so good a person. I am not sure which is my stronger sentiment anger or sorrow. 30 ELUL 3789 Spent more time on the mountain than I had anticipated. Apparently my sadness/anger was much deeper than I realized. Need to get back to work or will grieve myself to death. 1 TISHRI 3789 Didn't have to go back. The crowds found me. Many of them were followers of John. I realized that I really needed to forgive. The only real value in recalling a difficult past is that it allows us the opportunity to forgive. That is a very hard concept for the disciples to understand. They wanted to dismiss the crowds and go off and talk about our work. I told them they needed to feed the crowd. It is not enough for us to forgive, we have to reach out to others in their need. The disciples were amazed when they realized there was food left over. We have more than enough resources to help others. We do not need to send them elsewhere. 2 TISHRI 3787 Last night we had a long talk about the events of the day. I think we all realized that all of us are enriched when we forgive others. Hope that lesson holds. 3 TISHRI 3789 Word from Rome is that Tiberius has uncovered a plot to kill him. 8 TISHRI 3789 A real reign of terror has began because of the fear and anger of Tiberius. 17 TISHRI 3789 Treason trials now abound in Rome. Talk they may extend to the provinces like ours. 19 SHEBAT 3789 Met a humorous person today, Zaccheus. Just a little guy. I was passing through Jericho and he climbed up a tree so he could see me. Had supper with him. He is a tax collector. He and Levi hit it off well. Zaccheus wants to change his life style. 19 ADAR 3789 Am becoming more fearful about Judas. He was very upset because I went to Zaccheus' house. One of the disciples suggested that he might be dipping in to the common purse. 1 NISAN 3790 One of the few friends I have among the high priests has told me that the Pharisees and Sadducees plan to use the fear and obsession of Tiberius to do me in. They have begun recording my movements and reporting them to Roman officials. 4 NISAN 3790 More and more Pharisees, Sadducees, and Scribes are showing up wherever I go. The are asking leading questions, trying to get me to say something they can use against me. 6 NISAN 3790 Tried to get me to say we should not pay taxes to Rome. The hypocrites resent the tax and try to present me as someone who is so bad because he is against the tax. 7 NISAN 3790 Tried to get me to berate certain parts of the law. 8 NISAN 3790 Questioned me on divorce and other matter. Felt like I was on trial. In his last few days and hours Jesus did not have the leisure to add to his diary. His diary was found by Magdalene after Jesus' death. She dictated the following events and dates to Levi as a conclusion to Jesus' diary. 12 NISAN 3790 Most of Jesus' "trial" was held at night. Apart from the Sanhedrin there were not many persons who even knew about the trial. Peter managed to get close but had to leave. He was afraid they might seize him and try to force him to witness against Jesus or even put him on trial also. Peter was able to supply me with the following facts of the trial. Judas received money to monitor Jesus' movements, lead the soldiers out to make the arrest, and identify Jesus to the soldiers. The members of the Sanhedrin did not want to be involved in any way with Jesus' arrest. They wanted it to appear as a Roman action in view of Jesus' treason. Peter suggests that part of Judas' depression and suicide was Jesus was turned over to the Romans. Judas was very anti-Roman. He would like to have seen Jesus come out against the Romans. 13 NISAN 3790 The Sanhedrin sent Jesus to Pilate who in turn sent him to Herod. Herod sent Jesus back to Pilate. Much pressure was put on Pilate until he finally sentenced Jesus to death. Jesus was presented to Pilate as an enemy of Caesar, one who claimed to be King of the Jews. The Sanhedrin treathened to report Pilate to Tiberius Caesar as an enemy of Caesar. If Pilate failed to punish someone who had ambitions to be a king then he was a traitor to Caesar. Pilate had Jesus publicly mocked and beaten. But the Sanhedrin pushed for his death. THE REST OF THE NARRATIVE WAS THE PERSONAL WITNESS OF MAGDALENE HERSELF. The Sanhedrin managed to rouse a large crowd of people who were hostile to Jesus. They even brought out visitors who were in town for the Passover. Many of these people never heard of Jesus but were paid money to offer hostile remarks against Jesus. None of his closest followers were present. The only friends of Jesus in the crowd were a few women followers. They were unable to get very close because of the crowd of hostile persons. Jesus did not linger very long on the cross. He died very quickly. One member of the Sanhedrin, Joseph from the town of Arimethea, asked for Jesus' body so he could bury it in his own tomb. Pilate was surprised that Jesus had died so quickly. He sent one of the members of the Roman Legion to certify that Jesus was dead. Jesus appeared to be dead so the soldier thrust a lance into Jesus' side. When the body failed to react to the blow and the last drop of blood came out, he was able to certify that Jesus had died. Persons who joined the Roman Legion automatically became Roman citizens. The soldier who pierced Jesus' side was a young man from Nazareth. He had been an early admirer of Jesus. He even thought of being a follower of Jesus. But the allurement of Roman citizenship and a better life style were too great for him. I observed where he was buried so I could go and anoint his body at the first opportunity. 14 NISAN 3790 There was a very somber mood at the Passover today. Few people seemed in the mood for celebrating. It was more like a funeral than a religious festival. Although most of the priests seemed content and happy, they were unable to express it because the crowds might have rioted. Roman soldiers were visible everywhere. Although I did not see him, it was rumored that even Pilate himself was out on patrol so there would be no demonstrations or riots. 15 NISAN 3790 Went at sunrise to his tomb. We hoped to anoint his body. Wondered how we would get in. It was a very large stone they had used to enclose the tomb. It took eight men to put the stone in place. There were only four of us women. To our surprise the stone had been moved. There was an opening in the tomb. Wanted to go in but we were afraid. Wondered if someone else had come to anoint the body. Joanna yelled "hello". That awful hollow echo of her voice. Salome yelled a firmer "Who's there?" Again that hollow echo. We didn't know what to do. Someone had obviously been here. The tomb was open. We decided to go in. To our dismay the body was gone. We could only assume someone had come and stolen the body. We looked all around the garden for any kind of clue: footprints, discarded material, anything that would indicate someone had been here. Nothing! Now we were really confused. The other women went off to see if they could find Peter or some of the men. I did not want to leave the site. About fifteen minutes after they left I saw someone coming toward me. I thought he might be the caretaker of the grounds. I pleaded with him. "Sir, please, if you know where they have laid Jesus tell me so I can go and anoint his body." He smiled and said "Hello, Mary." When he spoke my name I realized that it was Jesus and that he was alive. I guess I became so excited that I almost crushed him. I could not believe he was alive. When he finally got me to let him go and got me calmed down he said. "I am alive and I am real. My body is no longer like the one you knew a few days ago. I will be able to be many places at the same time. One day when you die and your body is transformed and resurrected, you will understand all of this. But for now, try to get Peter and the other followers to believe. It is only by faith that you can experience my living presence." And then he disappeared. Almost as quickly as he had come. I was in ecstacy for a few minutes. Then in shock. Then I began to doubt. Was this an illusion? Did I really see Jesus or did I simply imagine it? From ecstacy I fell into doubt and was on the verge of despair. Then Joanna and Salome returned very excited. They had the same experience. We sought out Mary the mother of James and Joses. She too had seen Jesus and he had given her the same message. We found Peter and the other disciples locked up in the room where they had gathered with Jesus the night before he died. None of them had any sense of what had happened. You could see they wanted to believe but it was so hard. Finally I told Peter; "Don't take our word. Come and see for yourself." All the way out to the tomb Peter talked excitedly. He didn't make a lot of sense. He just talked. He was obviously frightened. Peter saw the empty tomb but did not experience the risen Jesus. I told Peter; "Jesus told me that it is only by faith that we will be able to see him." Peter was obviously shaken. On the way home he did not say a word. The whole day passed. That evening when the men were gathered together, they were able to experience the risen Jesus. Later Peter told me that he asked Jesus why it took so long for them to experience Jesus' resurrection and we woman had done so almost immediately. This was the answer Peter said the Lord had given him. "Well, Peter, the woman were thinking about me. They did not come out looking for some great miracle. They came to do that last act of human kindness and love for a person they loved. Their minds and hearts were focused on me not on themselves. They had no fear of anyone trying to stop them. They did not think of any possible adverse effects for themselves. They had no guilt about my death. They came simply because they loved me. You men, on the other hand, were still feeling guilt because you ran away and deserted me. You were still thinking about what might happen to you. You were wondering about your future. Part of your talk this morning was about whether you should go back to your boats. I am no longer here among you as a man like I have been for these last several months. I have been freed from the body. I am here as a pure spirit. I am no longer held back by the limitations of the body. You can only experience my presence when you allow yourselves to be freed from the worries and the limitations of your body. My resurrection means you are freed from all sin. It means you have nothing to fear. As I told you when I first appeared to you 'The sins you forgive, are forgiven. The sins you retain, are retained.' The sins which most need forgiveness are your own. The women had all experienced forgiveness in their lives and had allowed themselves to be forgiven. It is not enough for me to forgive you. You have to allow yourself to be forgiven. One of the reasons I was killed was the religious leaders did not want to allow themselves or the people to be forgiven, Somehow they feel like they will lose power over the people if they allow the people to be forgiven. You are now the religious leaders. Please do not make the same mistake. Allow yourselves and allow the people to be forgiven. My life, my death, my resurrection means all sins have been forgiven, even those you think are most serious." End of Jesus' diary. There is another fictional diary. It is that of Conaniah, a fictional person who lived at the time of Jesus Christ. It describes some of his thoughts about Jesus. To begin reading this diary press TO CONTINUE Thanks for stopping by. Hope you enjoyed the website and come back often. Each individual page has our name, address, phone number, and immediate access by e-mail. We hope to hear from you. 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